Self-Esteem

Comparisons Can Destroy Your Self-Esteem

The internet makes life so much more convenient. Got a question? Google the answer. Want to reconnect with a long-lost friend? Search for them on Facebook.

But there's one thing the internet actually makes more difficult - hanging onto your self-esteem!

In a few mouse clicks, you can see just how wonderful everyone else's life is. Whether it's the celebrity jetting off to Cannes or your college friend's over-the-top wedding, people use the internet to show off all the amazing things they're doing. Unfortunately, it's hard not to compare yourself to others when you see all those happy posts. However, going down this rabbit hole is a surefire way to destroy your self-esteem.

Here's why comparing yourself to others is so dangerous:

- It makes you jealous.

Instead of being genuinely happy that your coworker had a beautiful baby, you're sitting there grumbling, "Why don't I get to have a beautiful baby?!" And, unfortunately, jealousy is one of the most unflattering emotions on the planet.

- It makes you focus on weakness.

You may have been perfectly happy with your weight - until you saw your friend's Facebook post that detailed how they lost fifteen pounds. All of a sudden, your body isn't good enough. Instead of thinking about what you like about yourself, all you can think about is the "problem" that you need to fix.

- It makes you frustrated.

Know that awful feeling you get when you're so hungry that you're cranky? That's nothing compared to a big dose of frustration! Unfortunately, the more time you spend thinking about all the great things everyone else is doing, the more frustrated you're going to get. In the end, you may convince yourself that it's not even worth trying to move forward.

- It makes you become a hermit.

If you're spending time thinking about how much better off your friends are, the last thing you're going to want to do is hang out with them! Instead of silently stewing during happy hour, you'll choose to sit at home alone.

- It makes you anxious.

The more you compare yourself to everyone else, the louder the little voice in your head will get - you know, the voice that says you're awful and you're destined to fail. Let that little voice nag you long enough, and you'll be so anxious about failing that you'll never try anything!

- It can lead to depression.

Add all these things up and it's easy to slip into a full-blown case of depression. And, unfortunately, depression is a hard cycle to break out of. Don't think it can happen to you? Many people say they've actually sought out a therapist because of their excessive comparing!

Bottom line: stop measuring your worth against everyone else's persona - internet or otherwise. Instead of wishing that things could be better, go out and make them better!

In his book The Science of Being Great, Wallace D. Wattles wrote:

"... you are a god among gods. You are as great as the greatest, but all are your equals."

Always remember that!

By the way, if you have the least little issue with comparing yourself to others or your self-esteem in general, I highly recommend reading The Science of Being Great by Wallace D. Wattles in its entirety. You'll never look at yourself quite the same again! Click or tap the links below to get your copy today.

Click or tap here to get The Science of Being Great on Amazon Kindle.

Click or tap here to get The Science of Being Great along with eighty-three other rare books and articles by Wallace D. Wattles on Amazon Kindle.

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The Science of Being Great by Wallace D. Wattles

Wallace D. Wattles Master Collection


You, Your Kids, and Self-Esteem - Tips for Making Everyone Happy and Healthy

If you're a parent, you've got to pay close attention to your kids' self-esteem. Children and teenagers are very vulnerable to developing low self-esteem, and their opinions about their self-worth typically come from what their parents do and say. That means it's up to you to help them grow into happy, healthy, confident adults!

It's never too early to boost your kids' self-esteem. Even very young children will grow, develop, and learn at a much better pace if they've got a healthy dose of self-esteem. No matter how old your kids are, if they've got high self-esteem, you'll see them:

  • Act confidently.
  • Be independent.
  • Be responsible.
  • Be creative.
  • Enjoy interacting with other people.
  • Have plenty of energy.
  • Have an ability to handle both positive and negative emotions/situations.
  • Take pride in their accomplishments.
  • Handle frustration constructively by working towards a solution.

On the other hand, kids with low self-esteem will have trouble both at home and at school. If your kids are battling a self-esteem problem, you'll see they:

  • Feel unloved.
  • Have trouble making friends.
  • Are easily influenced by other people.
  • Refuse to try anything new.
  • Criticize themselves.
  • Pretend that they don't care about things.

If you notice any of these habits popping up in your kids, it's time to spring into action! Just remember the way a child sees themself can change frequently - even a few times a day! For example, your son may feel good about himself until a bully on the school bus teases him. When he gets home, you may see some of the effects of low self-esteem we just talked about.

In addition to keeping a close eye on your children, there are specific things you can do to make sure your kids have healthy self-esteem, like:

- Watching what you say.

This comes first because it has the biggest effect on your kids. Try to find the positive in each situation. For example, if your child failed a test, commend them for studying so hard.

- Being a good role model.

Like it or not, your kids will model their behavior after yours. So if you're always criticizing yourself, your kids will start criticizing themselves too. In fact, boosting your own self-esteem can work wonders for your kids! And, if you have a certain technique for giving yourself a shot of self-esteem, share it with your kids.

- Challenging irrational opinions.

If an opinion is repeated enough, your kids will believe it as fact. For example, if your daughter keeps telling herself she's stupid, she'll eventually believe it. But instead of just telling her she's wrong, point out specific examples of how smart she is.

- Being sincere with your affection.

Your kids need to see and hear how much you love them. However, kids are good at spotting fakes, so make sure you're being genuine with your words and actions.

- Making them understand no one is perfect.

It's important for your kids to learn that everyone makes mistakes. If it takes them awhile to learn something new, be patient and tell them that it's okay.

- Being respectful.

Above all else, treat your kids with respect. When you make a decision, explain the reasoning behind it. Encourage siblings to work out their differences on their own. This will show them that you trust them - and the more trust you put in them, the more trust they'll put in themselves!

Of all the things you could possibly send your kids to school with this coming school year, a healthy sense of self-esteem is by far the most important, and of all the things you could possibly teach them, here is by far the most important...

It comes from "The Matter of Attitude", the seventh of fifteen articles in Wallace D. Wattles' Lessons in Constructive Science series:

"Teach your child that there is nothing he cannot do; assure him that he may become superlatively great in any line toward which he may turn his attention. Tell him that there is only one Intelligence, and that he is that Intelligence; all that may be known he may know, and all that may be done he can do. And..."

This is key...

"... teach him that the same is true of every other child; that will keep him from becoming conceited. The conceited person is one who holds himself to be better than others; the truly modest person is one who exalts himself, while admitting that everybody else is as good, and as great as he. That is the true way to love your neighbor as yourself; simply admit that he is as good as you are. There is no other way that I know of."

Nor do I!

If you'd like to read the entire article, and, regardless of whether you're a parent or not, I highly recommend you do, click or tap the links below to get your copy today.

Click or tap here to get "The Matter of Attitude" and the other fourteen articles in Wallace D. Wattles' Lessons in Constructive Science series on Amazon Kindle.

Click or tap here to get "The Matter of Attitude" along with eighty-three other rare books and articles by Wallace D. Wattles on Amazon Kindle.

Click or tap here to get special enhanced versions of "The Matter of Attitude" and the other fourteen articles in Wallace D. Wattles' Lessons in Constructive Science series on Amazon Kindle.

No Kindle? No problem! Click or tap here to get a free Kindle reading app for your device.

Prefer paperback?

Click or tap here to get "The Matter of Attitude" and the other fourteen articles in Wallace D. Wattles' Lessons in Constructive Science series in paperback on Amazon.

Click or tap here to get "The Matter of Attitude" along with seventy-one other rare books and articles by Wallace D. Wattles in paperback on Amazon.

Related Page:

Lessons in Constructive Science by Wallace D. Wattles


The Key to Eliminating Low Self-Esteem? Affirmations!

Do you know where low self-esteem actually comes from?

It's what happens when your subconscious mind absorbs all kinds of negative messages. You may not consciously know they're in there, but they have a dramatic effect on how you feel about yourself!

Sounds scary, right?

Well, it doesn't have to be.

After all, if you can simply replace those messages with other, more positive messages, your self-esteem will climb back up to healthy, happy levels.

What's the best way to create those positive messages?

Use the power of affirmations! They can flood your subconscious with the positivity you need to feel good about yourself.

Here's how to use them the right way:

1. Speak in the present tense.

Saying "I love myself" is much more powerful than saying "I will learn to love myself" because it puts that powerful emotion (love) in the moment. Instead of maybe-hopefully-fingers-crossed getting around to loving yourself eventually, you're actively loving yourself right now - and that's a heavy dose of positivity!

2. Make your affirmations believable.

Your subconscious won't accept any ol' statement, so if you want your affirmations to truly make a difference, they've got to be believable. For example, if you say "I have a lot to offer to the world," your subconscious may scoff at you. Instead, say "I embrace my uniqueness and share it confidently with the people around me." That's a much more realistic statement that your subconscious will be willing to buy into.

3. Use the right tone.

Your subconscious is smart enough to pick up on the inflection that you use - or don't use! If you simply spit out a few affirmations without any emotion behind them - or, worse, with an emotion like sarcasm - your subconscious will never believe them. Instead, say your affirmations with genuine love and tenderness. They'll have a much bigger impact that way.

4. Make your affirmations a habit.

Your subconscious won't give up on those persistent negative messages immediately. If you really want to boost your self-esteem, you've got to counteract the negativity that's constantly flowing through your subconscious mind. That means you have to recite your affirmations at least a few times each day.

In fact, make it a habit to recite a few affirmations whenever doubts and other bad thoughts start to creep up. That way, you can take a proactive stance against negativity!

5. Be patient.

Your affirmations won't work overnight. In fact, you may have to wait weeks or even months to see an obvious difference. But the results you'll see eventually are well worth it, so don't give up! In the meantime, keep an eye peeled for even the tiniest of changes. That way, you'll have the inspiration you need to keep going!

High self-esteem is a common attribute of happy, healthy, productive people, those who get what they want in life. If you want to be one of them, taking control of your mind and making it think only what you want to think is absolutely essential.

Specifically how you do that is one of the many things I cover in-depth in my Wallace D. Wattles Quick Start Guide and expand upon in my Wallace D. Wattles Advanced Vision Guide. Click or tap the links below to get your copies today.

Click or tap here to get my Wallace D. Wattles Quick Start Guide on Amazon Kindle.

Click or tap here to get my Wallace D. Wattles Advanced Vision Guide on Amazon Kindle.

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No Kindle? No problem! Click or tap here to get a free Kindle reading app for your device.

Prefer paperback?

Click or tap here to get my Wallace D. Wattles Quick Start Guide in paperback on Amazon.

Click or tap here to get my Wallace D. Wattles Advanced Vision Guide in paperback on Amazon.

Click or tap here to get my Wallace D. Wattles Quick Start Guide and my Wallace D. Wattles Advanced Vision Guide bundled together at a discounted price in paperback on Amazon.

Note: I highly recommend completing my Wallace D. Wattles Quick Start Guide before beginning my Wallace D. Wattles Advanced Vision Guide.

Note: Among the many other things you'll learn in these books are specific techniques for dramatically increasing the effectiveness of your affirmations.

Related Pages:

Wallace D. Wattles Advanced Vision Guide

Wallace D. Wattles Quick Start & Advanced Vision Bundle

Wallace D. Wattles Quick Start Guide


Win the Battle of Your Inner Thoughts and Learn to Love Yourself

You probably know how important it is to love yourself, but actually doing it can seem downright impossible.

That's because you have to fight your subconscious mind.

Your subconscious is a powerful thing - with most of the messages in it dating all the way back to your childhood. It's responsible for all of those negative thoughts and feelings you have. And, unfortunately, things your parents and other people said and did decades ago are still playing a role in how your subconscious mind works today.

Want an example?

If someone important in your life told you that you weren't any good, that you weren't smart, or that you'd never amount to anything, you probably believed them. After all, you were just a little kid, and they were someone who played a big role in your life. Sadly, you still believe them to this day - even if you don't consciously remember the specific conversation. Your subconscious is using these sad statements in the background to influence your thoughts, and as long as you're being pummeled by them, you'll never truly love yourself.

So, how do you overcome these old messages and replace them with new, empowering messages?

It takes some work and some time to win the battle against your subconscious, but it can be done. Here's how:

1. Romance yourself.

Think back to the early days with your significant other. You probably spent a lot of time giving them attention and affection. And, in turn, you probably felt swept up in all of the attention and affection they showered on you. It's a wonderful feeling to be that loved, right?

So do it to yourself!

Go out of your way to treat yourself like royalty. Say sweet things to yourself, buy yourself some nice things, and spend time doing things that you really love. Remind yourself that you deserve all of this attention and affection, and soon enough, you'll really believe it!

2. Dive into your existing beliefs.

If you think your subconscious is full of thoughts that are holding you back - but you don't know what, exactly, they are - go on a journey of self-discovery. All you need is a pen and a piece of paper. Write down several prompts - like, "My earliest memory of feeling stupid is __," "My mom always made me feel __," "My father always treated me __,". Then, fill in the blanks with the first thing that pops into your head. By the time you're done, you'll see what's rattling around in your subconscious.

Once you know what you're up against, challenge those messages. Ask yourself if they're accurate. Were they ever accurate? Most importantly, do you want them to be accurate? If not, focus on how you think and feel now. With some work, you can fill your subconscious with new and improved messages.

3. Focus on the good.

If you're having trouble loving yourself, it's likely because you focus on what you do wrong, instead of what you do right. Eliminating this way of thinking can be tough, but you can do it by changing your self-talk. If that little voice in your head says good things, you'll eventually start loving yourself.

For example, when you accomplish something, congratulate yourself! Tell yourself how awesome you are for making things happen!

Even if nothing extraordinary is happening, you can change your self-talk. Simply make affirmations a part of your regular routine. By frequently telling yourself things like, "I'm valuable," "I have a lot to offer to the world," and "I'm talented," you'll start to believe them. And once you believe them, you'll legitimately love yourself!

Here's something for you to ponder...

It comes from "Your Own Ability", the sixth of fifteen articles in Wallace D. Wattles' Lessons in Constructive Science series:

"You are not a worm of dust; you are a god. You may not be manifesting much god-power just yet, but you are going to; you have it within you, and you only need to come to yourself. And you have not only the dynamic or vital power, but you have the mental ability; it all goes together. It does not matter in the least how many failures you have made in the past; you did not make them for lack of ability, but for lack of the technical knowledge how to so apply your ability as to produce results. No matter who you are, or what you have done, you have never given out a thousandth part of what is in you."

How true!

If you have any self-esteem issues whatsoever (and, quite frankly, even if you don't), for starters, I suggest you read this and its companion article, "The Matter of Attitude", the seventh of the fifteen articles in Mr. Wattles' Lessons in Constructive Science series to set yourself straight on some things you may need to be set straight on. Click or tap the links below to get them today.

Click or tap here to get "Your Own Ability", "The Matter of Attitude", and the other thirteen articles in Wallace D. Wattles' Lessons in Constructive Science series on Amazon Kindle.

Click or tap here to get "Your Own Ability", "The Matter of Attitude", and the other thirteen articles in Wallace D. Wattles' Lessons in Constructive Science series along with sixty-nine other rare books and articles by Wallace D. Wattles on Amazon Kindle.

Click or tap here to get special enhanced versions of "Your Own Ability", "The Matter of Attitude", and the other thirteen articles in Wallace D. Wattles' Lessons in Constructive Science series on Amazon Kindle.

No Kindle? No problem! Click or tap here to get a free Kindle reading app for your device.

Prefer paperback?

Click or tap here to get "Your Own Ability", "The Matter of Attitude", and the other thirteen articles in Wallace D. Wattles' Lessons in Constructive Science series in paperback on Amazon.

Click or tap here to get "Your Own Ability", "The Matter of Attitude", and the other thirteen articles in Wallace D. Wattles' Lessons in Constructive Science series along with fifty-seven other rare books and articles by Wallace D. Wattles in paperback on Amazon.

Note: Some of the best and most useful information you'll ever read on the subjects of ability and attitude (along with a whole host of other things) are contained in Wallace D. Wattles' Lessons in Constructive Science articles. I highly recommend them!

Related Page:

Lessons in Constructive Science by Wallace D. Wattles